Doris Visits Tenerife, Canary Islands on the P&O ship Azura A628
Tenerife is the largest of the Canary Islands and it has an active volcano, Mount Teide, which often rumbles and has a dramatic moonscape landscape now a National Park. Other landscapes here are the verdant valleys and lush plantations and vast pinewoods to the glorious beaches. There is a lot to see, but a great bus service throughout the island which I tested.
Santa Cruz
Tenerife’s cruise port Santa Cruz de Tenerife has grown from a fishing village to the capital city with 300,000 inhabitants. It is a welcoming city with classy bars and restaurants, shops, and interesting museums. It is easy to walk into the city, follow the blue line, cross the road, round the lake and the tourist office is hidden under an eco garden. The city begins right outside the port gates. If you chose to stay in the city you will find a café-lined boulevard leading to the Plaza de Espana, at the heart of the port’s main shopping area. If you prefer museums and galleries, try the Museo de Bellas Artes, which contains works by Bruegel. The Museo de la Naturaleza y El Hombre shows topography, flora and fauna.
However, I fancied an adventure and wanted to test the buses. The first was a simple tram to Trinidad, not the island but the Avenue in the old city of La Laguna.
La Laguna
Is definitely worth a visit and will take a half day to explore the old houses in the main street. Again, it has a tourist office, get off the tram, walk to the top of the road, turn left, walk a block then turn right and it should be on the corner. Ask someone, everyone is helpful. See my film on Laguna and you will be enticed.
PUERTO de la CRUZ
I could have got the bus direct to Puerto de la Cruz and we did get the bus all the way back. But from La Laguna we got the number 30 from the bus garage at the other end of Trinidad.
Here is a tip, get off at the Botanical Gardens then walk down. You will then pass the Orchid Gardens where Agatha Christie and William Wilde, Oscar’s father have stayed, and then can walk down to the sea. If you go all the way in you have to walk UP to the gardens and they close at 6pm.
It is likely your ship sails late from Tenerife so you have time to do the gardens and go down and enjoy Puerto de la Cruz for late afternoon and early evening. The promenade is very attractive and the coastline is dramatic. We treated ourselves to a lovely lunch overlooking the bay.
As always we will eventually cover them the gardens in a separate film .. another time.
We had plenty of time to explore as the ship didn’t sail till 10.30pm but I have to admit we were exhausted at the end of the day.
Tours available from your ship will probably include
Northern Panorama
Loro Parque
Gardens of the Valley
Puerto de La Cruz and Orotava Valley
Mamas and Tapas
Mount Teide National Park
Mount Teide Cable Car
Playa de las Americas on your own
Puerto de la Cruz on your own
After three days at sea which seemed to fly by, we arrived in Madeira, otherwise known as the Garden Island because of the wonderful display of sub-tropical plants and flowers. A few months before we arrived there was a terrible bush fire that destroyed homes and killed three people. The results were seen from the cable car.
You can walk into town from the ship and it is easy to see the route and how far it is.
It is hardly surprising that large and colourful flower markets are one of the most arresting features of Funchal, Madeira’s capital, though next door is the fish market that reminds you the island has a history of using the sea. Madeira is also known for its aquarium where you can dive with sharks, rays, morays and hundreds of other fish. Whale and dolphin watching are other featured activities for visitors to the island which is about twice the size of the Isle of Wight.
The market town is easily walkable and the further you go the steeper and narrower some of the streets become. On Santa Maria street, where there are many restaurants art work can be found on most of the doors. It features on the main Madeira film. Locally made wicker furniture gives a positive aroma to the clean air. Lacework and tapestries are also local trades as is the ubiquitous Madeira wine.
It will not surprise you that Funchal is also the base for tours to the islands botanical gardens; the fishing village of Camara de Lobos where Churchill went to paint, this also features on our main Madeira film. Camacha, the wicker centre; the Levada walks, part of an ancient irrigation system; and to Reids Hotel for traditional afternoon tea, making cruises to Madeira a must do. Many of these sites and more feature in our madeira film.
The Monte Tropical Gardens
The Monte Tropical Gardens are so extensive that you could spend a day there and walk back to the ship. Inside there is a three storey museum and the gardens and the museum feature in their own film although a short piece is in the main Madeira film. In the museum you will see art and sculptures from Zimbabwe and an exhibition of stunning minerals and stones.
The Toboggan Ride
Lastly the toboggan ride is great fun and one of the things Funchal is famous for. We thought we would show you the run in full although it is shown briefly in the main film. If you want to know what the toboggan run is like the full four minutes is covered.
The cable car, tropical gardens and toboggan ride are enough for one day without all the other things the island has to offer.
Tours available from your ship will probably include
Tea at Reid’s
Famous Toboggan Ride
Evening with Folklore (if overnight)
Deep Sea Fishing
Cable Car and Toboggan (see film above)
Nevada Walk
Jeep Adventure
Discover Whales and Dolphins by ‘rib’.
The Caves of São Vicente
Eco City Tour, Tuhxi Madeira
Farmers Market and Botanical Gardens
Leisurely Scenes of Madeira
As we head to the end of season 3 it is quite odd that the Barcelona sections shot last June have cut into the footage shot just months ago in the UK. In Barcelona we had the chance to use actor Gary Keates who works his character Manuel Martinez in international cabaret. Gary, a senior member of the Magic Circle has been talking to us for some time about doing a series on street magic, but as with most entertainers and actors who are working, they are always working. The goos in his calendar as about as bad (or good) as the dates in the Status Quo calendar. We know because we have been trying to find a gap that works for both with absolutely no success.
So, Gary takes us into Barcelona, episode 58.
Then the interiors of Barcelona are shot in the domestic office of Nick's in Chorleywood, almost a year apart exactly. And for a web series crew that has never used a costume or a make up department but acts as if in the theatre and expects the talent to look after themselves, can you spot any difference in Doris ???
In episode 59 Nick Simons plays the evil jeweller. Having directed this episode myself I wanted to make it feel different. I want to feel like Doris was away from her normal safe haven and in someone else's back yard. So I turned off the lights.
Then in the magic of cinema, to use such a pun with a qualified magician, we jump back a year, into Barcelona and see Doris leave. Now, when we shot this we had not written the script inside the office but I suspected that Doris might kill the jeweller and run. At least she would have stolen some or all of the nanobots, because let's face it, having been jilted and now being offered the chance to take over the world .... so, does the story flow seamlessly?
The web series has been a huge success and someone in the office came up with a great idea. Well, is it. Who knows. A young actor had just spent £450 making a showreel on video to use on line. They had also spent the same making a voice reel. I guess if you are entering a profession it is no different to spending thousands on training, but the ethics aside, it was not very good. Not only that it looked rather cold and vacuumous (my spell checker hates that word, which is why I like it even more).
We give new cameramen and directors a chance and produce pretty good episodes. So the idea was that an actor could suggest an episode to fit in between any two and become an 'a' episode ... like 56a, a policeman stops Doris after she has killed the refuse collector Ben Manstead (Bin Man's Dead) in the woods. They could set up whatever they need to play a 4 to 6 page episode with Doris for £350. Now that is cheaper than the other guys were charging. We would work with them on the script, and finish the episode and put it up in sequence as a showreel of .... and an episode, which we keep usage rights to and allow you usage rights. Same/same.... Owning content and having your own platform for PR is going to be essential for any actor in the future.
Having spawned the idea the others here said it would never fly, and I must say the money does not entice me to do lots, because the money just does not cover the effort and equipment. However, it is an idea and you just never know what it brings. It might just bring the best ever episode of Doris Shades ever. Episodes in a web series can be entered into festivals, you could win a Best Actor Award.
That is a serious remark because twice Jean Heard was voted best actress in a world web series by We Love Soaps / Indie Series Network in the USA.
News about episode 61, the last episode in Season 3, and where the series is going will come soon, but we are trying to clear the decks ready to head off on a cruise to the Canary Islands to shoot episodes for Doris Visits... which is the spin off series you must have seen.
So will you be episode 62 ???? or 55a.... have you got what it takes to win an award and have faith enough to put energy behind the belief in your talent.
PS if anyone out there knows how to wrap text round a YouTube film in Blog spot, do tell....
see our new adventure www.dorisvisits.com, and make us a film ....
Doris Shades is a woman, she has needs. Revenge is amongst them.
There is a tipping point which makes most people turn bad. Doris met hers when her husband left.
The picture below is from episode 56 when Doris dumps a dead body in the woods.
Another dead body.
Doris knew when show woke up to an empty bed that he was never coming home. She knew when her best friend and neighbour came by for coffee that morning that she would have to breach the subject, that she, Wilma was sleeping with her husband. But hey, that shouldn't break up a good friendship. He is the shit, not her, and he should die. Wilma her friend should kill him for her.
Now you can see this is a dark strange series, and we have now put up 61 episodes and although Doris tried to kill Brad she failed. She just happened to accidentally kill a lot of other people along the way. She accidentally became a serial killer and we accidentally had a series on our hands.
GUEST STARS
Guest stars have included James Whale from Celebrity Big Brother (ep 32), Olympian Derek Redmond (eps 43 to 54) and child star now a little older, Richard Beaumont (ep 20 to 40).
However, after what is almost a two year break from work he has now directed few episodes of Shades Of Bad in a move to get back in the swing. Shades hardly represent the big toys he normally organises and takes responsibility for, but he has started to down size and put his two Red Weapon cameras and the Scarlet up for sale on RedUser.
Shades Of Bad has evolved a lot as he has taken more notice. He pushed Buster to shoot outside at night, then in the woods. Then challenged the girls to write and direct. Now, he has taken a trip to Barcelona with actor Gary Keates and Jean who plays Doris. Starting at 10am, in 4 hours he had shot the 'to and from' the Jewellers shop and was having lunch in a bar. His attitude has changed a lot in two years. But as Stuart says, when you have nearly been killed you think differently.
Stuart then recreated a Jewellers office at actor Nick Simons' house where he shot the interiors of Barcelona. The other sections are in his and Jean's house where Jean makes most of Shades Of Bad. Where as Buster preferred the kitchen, Stuart pushed actor Oliver Degnan for an edgy performance style and a walk into a new area. Stuart likes scenes to be busy visually.
Whether there is visible a difference between the episodes is for the eye to see, they were both shot as fast as the older episodes. Whether Shades Of Bad has entered a new era, or signalled one, a few motivated well known actors have taken notice at the shooting possibilities. They are asking Stuart to look at advising on how they can make their own films with a micro crew. Shades Of Bad has now over 3 hours of edited drama and never had a make up or costume or continuity department. Actors work this way in Fringe Theatre, what they need is the assistance of an enabler to turn their art into film.
Actors Nick Simons and Oliver Degnan are also represented by INDYUK, they both left the profession for proper jobs and a proper wage but are both still very confident infant of camera.
INDYUK can be found on most sites and via the home/contact page on www.DorisVisits.com
The web has now made anywhere your theatre, you can film on the street, in the tube, in the woods and do not have to build a set. So, with the world your oyster and the phone in your camera, it is time to experiment. Those with a natural flair will become tomorrows enablers.
I often compare acting to football because it is such a grounding and obvious comparison. How many years is it before you allow a footballer to be either the captain, or the manager? But, do those who work that hard from the start get noticed right from the kick-off and are shaped for better things? Shaped because they are future captains? Yes, it is how our film stars are made just in the same way as footballers. Those who put the time in get the rewards.
Shows that get to run as long as Greys Anatomy, and it has now been running longer than ER, allow the team to learn and then expand by directing if they show the flair to be able to see the 'whole picture'. Shades Of Bad reached that at episode 56, because, Lynn knew she was leaving the show and there was a gap for another episode between 56 and the next.
I suggested they look at the male Hot Crazy Matrix and work out how Wilma (who has stolen Doris's husband) tells her to find a man. Now, whether you like Hot Crazy Matrix or not - don't knock success, learn from it. The main original film was shot in ten minutes for a laugh and has over 15 million views and is in discussion with Hollywood Studios about how this might progress as a film or a TV series. There have been two or three female attempts to parody this, all have failed to even dent a respectable number of views. So, that is what I threw at them..... In our story, Doris is being sent to Barcelona which was to be episode 57, I can delay that a week if they come up with an episode. Plan it, shoot it. I managed to get Buster to come back and do camera and tech crew for them, but let them direct.....
Directing is a tough job managing a huge team of workers and technicians, managing time, respecting a budget (most directors are sacked on day three of a movie because they cannot do that time/money bit). Also they work with story and a couple of actors but seriously one would hope most of that was done before walking on the set. Now is the manufacturing time. It is a tough job to get right, and not until the producer walks on the set looks at his watch and says, 'what's the hold up?' do you start to feel the need for speed. PRESSURE.
The producer might get the answer, 'no, not today, don't have a go at me today!' but, they expect that, they have done their job. As I said, directors who do not head it, find themselves sacked three days later.
I did walk on and say that after an hour of nothing, I was as un welcome as all producers doing that.
So, when you are at work, which are you?
Are you the crew member or actor that stands and chats or the one who watches every department and learns? Are you the next David Beckham who is sponge like; watching and learning. How many Wayne Rooney's are there, very few. How many hours did David Beckham stay behind every day after training to practice placing the ball with passes and shots - it is said 2 extra hours a day. Greatness is thrust upon those whose dedication knows no bounds. If you are an actor who never trains and whose first question when arriving on set is, 'when can I finish only I have a ......' You might not be director material.
So, time and experience are the enemy when you are starting and have neither, and both are your friend to use and abuse when you have credits. Here is where the web series has opened the future. You have a chance to film and film.
How many episodes before you can call yourself a series?
This is a great question and I upset a few people a year ago when I asked this. A series is at least 7 in the real world and that is a test. That is a shot comedy series like Mrs Brown's Boys. 13 episodes is a normal season for drama, 26 episode a more modern number in broadcast for US TV like Blue Bloods and Madam Sectretary. If you have only three or four, or five, that is normally called a 'five-part drama'. A four or five part drama can sit and do, in one week. It is not a series.
Now it is different. There are huge web series out there. A year ago there were fewer web series and very few who could produce content. Now there are huge numbers, far greater than Shades Of Bad which has shot 61 episodes thus far and has started a travel show with more episodes that 61 in a shorter time. Over 140 shows in a year, some great ones, some not so great. The travel show will outlive the drama, see a sample here.
When Jean started directing episode 43 episode 56 had been shot, like soaps and series we shoot out of order. The Barcelona sections of episode 58 and 60 were shot after episode 6 a year ago.
You can be excused for not remembering many of the thousands of Edinburgh shows that are in the festival each year.... that is the point. If you are a performer, what will it bring, and is it cost effective. Too late if you are up there .... bit maybe not to get a little additional exposure. Read on.
Digs, that is where you stay, food and drink is expensive and you will probably end up losing a lot of money and gaining much experience. So, is it worth it. The years Jean Heard has done Edinburgh with both Mutton and her one woman show Royal Mistresses, she has been sponsored (by Tena Lady) so her Edinburgh was paid for. But that is not the case for most.
That moment on stage is so quickly gone and the myth of talent forgotten that she decided to make a web series.
Luckily Jean does own a film company that has made features and owns kit (they are actually selling their 2 x Weapon Cameras at £16,500 each ONO). So she devised Doris Shades Of Bad. So is the web series the new Fringe theatre and is it right for people to learn media skills and camera skills rather than live audience skills. They are advertised on red User or you can get us via the contact at www.DorisVisits.com
An MCN is a multi channel network and all the majors are now starting to have them. This is like a record label or publisher ..... an MCN becomes your label and aids you. Shades Of Bad YouTube channel signed to Makers Studio / Disney. You still output still goes on all the many many platforms from YouTube and DailyMotion down to the smaller ones and future ones like OPERA TV app as we move back towards the TV. For us the MCN had not really worked, they do not even answer our emails to them. Also YouTube has not been our best responder, so where to pitch your venue will take time to learn.
Web Series and Content owning
What comes out of the web live theatre is your audience are real, they react and you get feed back. You can research watch trends and change to fit their requests. Doris Shades Of Bad saw the show reach number 2 in the US charts and Jean be voted best actress twice last year in the USA. But this takes time so you realise that the word series means just that, you need content, regular content. one, three five is not a series. That is a four parter. A series needs to be longer, released at regular intervals so the web spiders can see you are a content provider and will work with you.
Celebrity Big Brother kicks off, and Doris Shades Of Bad guest star James Whale is in there.
The new big brother house revealed it's initial celebrity guests, and it has the usual mix of controversial guests. The spoon to stir them all up could be chat show host and broadcaster James Whale, especially if the new guests to arrive are politicians as rumours have it.
Almost all the web series shows nominated for awards in the USA were American, but guest star Richard Beaumont was nominated for his guest appearance. Ricky was a child star in many films like Digby the Dog. Now, as we head into the Rio Olympics period World Champion and Olympian Derek Redmond becomes a huge presence in ten episodes ... episodes 43 to 53. Derek was hugely nervous in his first acting role and due to his packed diary he often had to change days, arrive late and on one day had a Sky Sports camera team arrive at the house to take over and interview him during a lunch break. Take a look at his entrance and maybe lay bets on him being in the house next year.
Where is Shades Of Bad now?
Good question. There is no doubt that the tail is now wagging the dog. The spin off travel show Doris Visits has become an instant huge web success and has been selected and put onto the Opera TV channel already. The web site went up a few days ago www.dorisvisits.com (click this text) and already has over 60 pages loaded and schedule to release at two each day, then one a day.
Take a look at just one show, Doris is very different in the travel show and it makes for a very friendly and engaging presentation.
This weeks episode is number 55
Fifty five episodes of a web series and still going is quite a fete. The girls, Jean and Lynn who play Doris and Wilma just wrote and directed their own episode which Buster came back and patiently did camera from. That will slot in between episode 56 and 57 and delay the next guest star from arriving by another week. This week, episode 55 is called the garage where the three girls load a dead body into the car to go and dump it in the woods (next weeks). Three leave, only two come back is all the hint we will give you. Next week in the woods was the first UK exterior location, and a night shoot. Did they have a crew and lights.... did they heck. Total crew was doubled from one to two ! And a hand generator was borrowed to work their 3 x LED light panels.
Manuel Martinez
Is a name you might not know unless you are involved with the live cabaret circuit. He is a comedian / magician who just played at Stephen Hawkins even in the Canaries, and is well known on the cruise ship circuit. He comes in and goes and comes back and.... well, that is the future. A glimpse of him is in the behind the scenes video explaining how Doris Shades Of Bad shot in Norway and Barcelona.
The future of Doris Shades Of Bad
Ex INDYUK Films producer and then assistant to Duncan Heath at ICM, Philip Kennan has been brought back with the remit of turning the series on its head. The series will start and timeline Doris Shades post arrest and in treatment, and all that has been shot will be used as flash backs. He has free reign to explore all possibilities. There is no time line on this as there are no less that 6 cruises booked and a number of other trips for Doris Shades to take as Doris Visits.
The Baltic Cruise ! Arcadia J612 in August, and Britannia B716 in June 2017 will cruise the Baltic. They will stop at
these ports, so these videos will help you choose your excursions or plan what you are going to do.
P&O Aurora R621 & Arcadia J620 both sail at Christmas and will have the wonderful Christmas Markets to enjoy in the many countries who really celebrate Christmas. The Silver Wind and Silver Whisper also travel these routes.
Aurora R705 then goes back to the Baltic in May 2017, Arcadia again in June 2017, Aurora R710 goes in July, Arcadia J713 in August, then December 2017 the Christmas markets are the joy of the Aurora going there twice; R722 and R724.
The canals in Bruges should seriously be considered because the tours cost only a few euros and only take 30 minutes, that means you see a lot in a small time for a small cost.
The restaurants near the canal station seem to have a slight premium on those away from main areas.
St. Petersburg, Russia
It is unlikely any ship goes to St. Petersburg and does not do an overnight stay. As a tip, that is the night the fine dining might offer a free bottle of wine on board ship. Even with two days it is not enough time to see all of St.Petersburg so choose your excursions to hit the spots you wish to see most. Book early, book on line if possible before you leave. Russia is a place where a visa is needed unless you leave the ship on an organised tour where a visa waiver has been agreed.
More films on St Petersburg and Bruges and compilations are in the edit. They will follow.
The Baltic cruise packs in a lot and as you can see can be a lot of work for you as a guest, so it is best planned with a little knowledge, and in at least a few stops you will want the excursion coach to take the strain. Check in again with us to see the newest films.
Check back on this post for more videos as they come out of the edit, there is a queue at Doris TV which includes the Shades Of Bad web TV series, the Status Quo behind the scenes series from Bula Quo, as well as the Dubai Top ten Doris Visits favourites, but they will be up soon.
If you have never cruise, know your ship, we have tours of two that will help you visualise as you compare what the brochures say.
